In Kafka In The Castle, I fill in the ‘missing’ diary entries from Kafka’s real diary. He either did not fill in these days himself, or he destroyed them. There are some estimates that Kafka destroyed 70% – 80% of everything he wrote.
02 February 1917
Their faces – sometimes.
I am not a man to cry (am barely capable of it) but those times when I see their faces. The social cast gone, and they think themselves unobserved.
They have such a revelation that they do not care – or, more accurately, they are beyond caring. A bewildering revelation. A truth, which once known, they can never escape.
They now know they can never escape.
Perhaps, because I observe more, I see more.
Or, perhaps the less resilient come through the doors of the Institute, with their injuries and their needs. Perhaps it is this war.
Perhaps they somehow know that although I judge, I never pass sentence.
When I see this look upon their faces – the fear of life itself.