In Kafka In The Castle, I fill in the ‘missing’ diary entries from Kafka’s real diary. He either did not fill in these days himself, or he destroyed them. There are some estimates that Kafka destroyed 70% – 80% of everything he wrote.
Of the people described in this entry: Max is Kafka’s best friend; F. is his fiancee; The Swiss Girl was a first love; Ottla is his sister.
07 March 1918
Dreamed I had another life. At the same time I had this one.
My additional life may not have always been what I chose, but it was always better than what I have.
At the Sunday dinner, Max was my father, and Ottla was my mother – although our ages remained the same. Sometimes my wife was the Swiss girl, sometimes it was F’s best friend. And sometimes it was Ottla.
I would still see my father in this other life, but only when I went into his store to make some purchase. He was as mean and gruff as ever.
I always shortchanged him.