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Wagner And Putin Walk Into A Bar / Then History Takes A Turn

~ I’m singing at your funeral, Putty.
~ I made you what you are.
~ Götterdämmerung, baby.
~ You are my creature!
~ Always be afraid of Frankenstein.
~ I made you, and I can destroy you.
~ That’s what they all say.
~ You were my cook, for God’s sake.
~ So I know about blood and guts.

~ You are such a little man.
~ I wouldn’t throw stones over that, Putty.
~  I’ll crush you!
~ With what? I’m the only army you really have.
~ You were just here to get Ukraine.
~ Ukraine is lost. *Your* army saw to that.
~ I am the new Tsar of All The Russias.
~  I’ll give you some time, Putty, to get out.
~To where?”
~ Don’ know.  Don’t care.

До свидания! / Do svidaniya!

D UEL

Wagner And Putin Walk Into A Bar

~ I’m singing at your funeral, Putty.
~ I made you what you are.
~ Götterdämmerung, baby.
~ You are my creature!
~ Always be afraid of Frankenstein.
~ I made you, and I can destroy you.
~ That’s what they all say.
~ You were my cook, for God’s sake.
~ So I know about blood and guts.

~ You are such a little man.
~ I wouldn’t throw stones over that, Putty.
~  I’ll crush you!
~ With what? I’m the only army you really have.
~ You were just here to get Ukraine.
~ Ukraine is lost. *Your* army saw to that.
~ I am the new Tsar of All The Russias.
~  I’ll give you some time, Putty, to get out.
~To where?”
~ Don’ know.  Don’t care. До свидания! / Do svidaniya!

D UEL

Putin and Stalin Walk Into A Bar

~ Vlad, you murderous whore.

~ Josef, you cold, cruel killer.

~ Greetings and conquest be upon you.

~  My people are letting me down.

~ Oh – and a Happy Birthday!

~  You remembered.

~  Well, the way you’re going . . .

~  Yes?

~ It will be your last.

~ You think Ukraine can defeat me?

~ If it walks like a duck . . .

~  They are an army of pissants.

~  And quacks like a duck . . .

~  They survive on American guns.

~  And swims like a duck . . .

~  They were lucky to sink ships.

~  Vlad, listen to Uncle Joe.

~ Yes?

~  You are going to have to duck.

~ The Russian people will defend me.

~  Vladimir Vladimirovich Putin.

~ Yes?

~ Tzar Pretender!

~ Yes?

~ I know the Russian people.

~  Yes.

~ I slaughtered them by the millions.

~ Yes.

~ Enjoy your birthday – while you can.

DE  BA.  UEL

Putin And Hitler Walk Into A Bar

~ Vlad . . . Vlad . . . You have learned nothing.

~ Adolf – the times are different.

~  Oh, Mein Gott – the times I said that.

~ I’ve learned from you, Adolf.

~ Vlad – you can’t even take the fucking Ukraine.

~ They will fold.

~ They’re kicking your Kremlin ass.

~ I will regroup and . . .

~ You’re losing men. You’re losing guns You’re losing tanks.

~ I have imposed conscription and  . . .

~Tanks!  When you’re losing tanks – you’re losing.

~ I’ve got missiles that are carving them to pieces.

~ You slaughter civilians but you are losing troops.

~ I am getting more.

~ Vlad! I ended up putting children in the trenches.

~ They are valiant fighters and . . .

~  Vlad! Even I didn’t believe my own bullshit.

~  I am the new Tzar! I will prevail!

~ Vlad. Winter is coming.

~ Cold and snow isn’t going to  . . .

~ Vlad. I know about winter.

~ You did not have my power.

~ Holy Vladivostok. You are going to lose your whole country.

DE BA. UEL

Commander-in-Chief Putin Needs All of His Masks To (Perhaps) Survive

I have updated this post from an earlier year, by making a number of cuts, and changing the name of the character to Putin. Waste not, want not.  I believe this character remains suitably ridiculous, but is now dangerous beyond my imagination.

+ + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + + +

Commander-in-Chief  Putin decided it would be a grand day to become Admiral of the Fleet – Lord High Admiral, if he chose the hat with cockade and plume.

The plume put on an impressive display, as he either agreed (or disapproved) with a toss (or a shake) of his head. The dancing ostrich feathers would add a dashing air as he boarded his flagship. He would, of course, be extra careful about the pitfalls awaiting a small man, with ornate dress sword and scabbard, among the steep steps and narrow companionways.

Wednesday is khaki day for Commander-in-Chief Putin.

It was the day set aside to remind him of the loyalty he must always retain from his men. What is a leader without his troops? As a treat – for really, dull brown did not make a striking appearance – he would choose the tank commander’s uniform.

With its wide web belt and shiny black holster on the hip, the flap unsnapped, to reveal the butt of a MP-443 Grach, or “Rook”.  And  black leather gloves.. And a steel helmet polished to a mirror-shine.

The riding crop? Ah, the riding crop was debatable.

Today Commander-in-Chief Putin will have a parade.

Massed men at attention with stiffly-held rifles and fixed bayonets.

Commander-in-Chief Putin would have to choose carefully. to represent his awesome power and responsibility. Cavalry boots are a must, raising half-way up the calf, resounding with silver spurs, steel-tipped toes and elevated heels.

Then would come crisp black trousers, billowing majestically around the thighs, kept up with a wide leather belt. He took care that each red stripe reaching the length of each leg was as straight as an arrow.

His blue tunic, he decided, would have only muted decorations, with the minimum of gold braid entwined about his shoulders. He is – after all – a fighting general.

Although I Judge, I Never Pass Sentence

In Kafka In The Castle, I fill in the ‘missing’ diary entries from Kafka’s real diary. He either did not fill in these days himself, or he destroyed them. There are some estimates that Kafka destroyed 70% – 80% of everything he wrote.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

02 February 1917

Their faces – sometimes.

I am not a man to cry (am barely capable of it) but those times when I see their faces. The social cast gone, and they think themselves unobserved.

They have such a revelation that they do not care – or, more accurately, they are beyond caring. A bewildering revelation. A truth, which once known, they can never escape.

They now know they can never escape.

Perhaps, because I observe more, I see more.

Or, perhaps the less resilient come through the doors of the Institute, with their injuries and their needs. Perhaps it is this war.

Perhaps they somehow know that although I judge, I never pass sentence.

When I see this look upon their faces – the fear of life itself.

Putin and Trump Walk Into A Bar and Discuss the Future [UPDATED]

~ How much vodka did you have, Vlad?

~ Why do you ask, Donnie?

~ ‘Cause you’re reaching kinda far – even for you.

~ Are you jealous, Donnie?

~ Well, I had God on my side, and even I didn’t take this step.

~ You were a funny little president, Donnie.

~  You’re making me seem lucid.

~ So far – so good. Isn’t that right, Donnie?

~ What is good about this; Vlad?

~ I’m still standing,

~ For how long?

~ Until I am Tzar of all the Russias.

Note:

The title Tsar of all the Russias originated in connection with Russia’s victory in the Great Northern War of 1700-1721 and appeared as the adaptation of the Tsar ‘s title under the accepted system of titling in Europe.

Russia Invades The Artic With Paratroopers

3000

So implies the newspaper headlines in the Spring of 2020. With photos. Photos provided by the Russian military.

In The Bonner Resolution, my novel of NATO Military Intrigue, the Russians do not invade the Artic. But they make stealth under the ice with a nuclear submarine. NATO is waiting.

This is how “The Bonner Resolution” begins:

 

Afternoon ZULU Time 14:52

The sky is clear and cold.

And blue.

This does not help while watching the expanse of ice. Colonel Bonner thought it would. He thought such a clean demarcation of surface and horizon would accentuate anything appearing between the two. Across kilometers of rippled ice that encourages the winds. The winds that make the Arctic cold penetrate his high tech parka and his thermal long johns. They talk about “wind chill” in the country Bonner is used to. They don’t know nothing.

Before this assignment, Colonel Bonner presumed he had been every place NATO could send him. He has been in war zones. He has been in safe zones where people did not know there is a war. He has been in those diplomatic zones that teeter-totter between the two. Those most of all. He has fought enemies both foreign and domestic. He has averted disaster of massive proportions on his own soil (well – legal sea boundary) that has still managed to remain unexplained.

It was cold there, too.

Colonel Bonner is lying under white camouflage blankets and upon a waterproof mat. He has been in this position for two hours. Any longer and he will be prone to hallucinations. Any longer and he will freeze his balls off – regardless of protective clothing and insulated mat. This is not just his opinion; it is the observation of his guide. His Canadian Ranger companion had nudged him on the shoulder and cupped his own groin and pointed at his watch. If he wants to have babies he’ll move his ass. The cold doesn’t creep up on you, it hits with a wallop. From one minute to the next.

Bonner looks at his own watch. Twenty minutes left though he feels he could have been here either four hours or forty minutes. Time expands and contracts at the same time. This happens during long periods of observation, wherever he has such an assignment. It happens with more force when there is virtually nothing to see. The passage of the sun is the most notable action going on before him. It proves to be of little distraction. And anyway, it is dimmed by his snow goggles.

Bonner adapts to this barren reality by accepting it is not really barren. He pays attention not only to the things the Canadian Rangers teach him, but he watches how they interact to the surroundings. With few humans to deal in an environment that can kill them, they are far more attentive to their senses than he. A creaking of ice, or the slant of shifting snow, tells them more than a manual reveals. They can smell a change coming toward them that is hours away. He makes an attempt to follow their lead. He keeps his mouth shut on the inane observations those from the south are prone to make. He has been shown his restraint is appreciated.

 

**************************

And this is but one of the many news stories that  cover the real event.
[IMAGE]  https://storage.googleapis.com/afs-prod/media/media:52a815de8b63498e8121d16f40112b6f/3000.jpeg

Trump And Putin Walk Into A Bar And Discuss The Future

 

FILE PHOTO: U.S. President Donald Trump and Russia's President Vladimir Putin talk during the family photo session at the APEC Summit in Danang

~ How much vodka did you have, Vlad?
 
~ Why do you ask, Donnie?
 
~ ‘Cause you’re reaching kinda far – even for you.
 
~ What do you mean, Donnie?
 
~ Asking your fellow Ruskies to keep you in power for life.
 
~ Are you jealous, Donnie?
 
~ Well, I have God on my side, and I haven’t taken that step.
 
~ Yet.
 
~ Nyet.
 
~ You’re a funny little president, Donnie.
 
~  Gotta keep the deplorables laughing.
 
~ So far – so good. Isn’t that right, Donnie?
 
~ Yes.
 
~ So, how can I help you?
 
~ I’d like some pointers.
 
~ I’m preparing for 2024, Donnie.
 
~ I know.
 
~ Well, you’re starting too late.

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