It is a whirlwind in here



Space & The Universe Are Going Around In Circles



There is a new map of the Universe, created after ten or more years and looking past numbers that are in the billions. There are also pretty colours.

I appreciate space speculations, and accept that the folk who come up with them, plus the knowledge and machines they use, make their pronouncements and suppositions more relevent than my musings. But I haven’t been proved wrong yet.

This excerpt from one of my short stories keeps being very popular, so maybe I have achieved an answer by having no real answer. Sounds likle the Universe to me.  I’m always glad and willing to add to knowledge about the unknown.


“Circles are the answer.

“Just look at any circle and you’ll see what I mean. Of course, no one else is to know about the circles. They must be very stupid if they can’t see something so obvious.

“Yet, you get hints, don’t you – all the time out there. And in your own life – the way things happen so you never get anywhere. Never change.

“The earth, of course, and the sun – well, that’s something you can see. Either way you look at it, the one goes around the other in a big circle that takes in the whole sky. And the earth and the sun and the moon are round  – all circles in their own right. So you have circles which are going around in circles, if you get my meaning.

“And if you look further – reach out into the universe as far as you can go – they tell us that everything is going around everything else. Smaller circles and elongated circles which take in such large distances that numbers become forgotten.

“Now, this means that everything, eventually, comes back upon itself. The beginning is really the end. That’s what most people would think – and that’s where they make their mistake.

“You see, things don’t start by beginning – they start by ending. It’s the end which comes first in a circle, so, instead of going back to where it started, it comes back to its end.

“That explains it.”


Trump And A Boy Scout Walk Into A Bar



~ Pardon me, Mr. President.

~ Sure, kid, I’ll pardon you. What have you done?

~ No, I don’t mean that. I mean, beg my pardon.

~ Polite boy. Delightful. Love that. What?

~ I’m not old enough to be in a bar.

~ That’s OK – I don’t even drink.

~ Then why …

~ Anyway – I can still pardon you, if you need it.

~ … are we …

~ It’s good to be the king.

~ Were you ever a Boy Scout, Mr. President?

~ Boy, Boy Scouts are great. They’re boys and they’re great.

~ But were you –

~ Boys make up Boy Scouts – all boys.

~ That’s why they’re called Boy Scouts, Mr. President.

~ Never too young to get those badges. Tie those knots.

~ We have to work to get –

~ I like tying people up in knots.

~ It takes us hours of –

~ I mean with words – tie them up. No real knots. Lot’s of words. Lots.

~ It takes many hours of work.

~ Though you can tie people up with rope. Many reasons.

~ Mr. President?

~ Yup, Scout boy. Nice uniform.

~ If I do get a drink, will you still pardon me?

~ One billion percent. I will. Maybe more. Trust me.



Cops In The Hall / Blood On The Door



I was watching the News on television. It was about 10:15 in the evening. It had been a tiring day and I was not too far from bed. A knock came to my door. An insistent knock.

I’m in an access-controlled building and assume a knock on the door is from someone living here. So I opened the door without hesitation. It was the fellow who lives in the apartment next. He was pointing at my door and he asked if I was all right. He was obviously agitated.

I looked at my door. There was a smear of blood on it. He then pointed at the floor. Drops of blood trickled to my door. Then he pointed to the outside entrance, on the other side of the locked door. There were gouts of blood on the carpet and smears of blood on the glass.

“You OK?”

I assured him none of the blood was mine. We looked along to the other end of the corridor. People in their night clothes were milling around. We went to join them.

An couple were standing in front of the open door to their apartment. I could hear shouting and thumping and what sounded like someone kicking the wall. It was not happening in their apartment, but from the one above them. They said they had heard this type of thing on any number of nights. Then a yell turned into a scream.

So, the police were called.

The commotion upstairs, with few lulls, continued on for the five minutes it took the police to arrive. One officer joined us, heard the noise and yelling, and decided to await another police car. This did not take long, and shortly they both went up. The noise subsided. I returned to my News.

A few minutes later there were more emergency lights outside on the street. An ambulance. Assuming haste was important, I went and opened the front door for them. They asked where the apartment was. I told them. As they passed the elevator they asked if it worked. I said that it did, but it was really quicker to take the stairs. One of the EMS responders said that they understood, but they needed to know if they could use the elevator if they had to take someone out on a stretcher. I assured them it worked.

Over the next half hour four additional police officers arrived. From a number of conversations, I learned there had been four people in the noisy apartment. Somehow one of them had sustained a bad hand or arm cut. That person was taken in the ambulance but I did not see this. A young man in T shirt and jeans was taken past my door in handcuffs. He complained that his boots were not tied. An officer obliged him by bending over to tie his laces.

I was interviewed by a burly police sergeant. I knew nothing of the occupants of the apartment, and did not known they had been causing noise for the previous weeks. However, I did realize I had heard a commotion in the Entrance before the News. There had been muffled voices, and the sound of the wall being thumped. Unusual but nothing to cause alarm. It appears that the wounded person had either been injured in the entrance way, or his friends had been trying to get him to go to a hospital but he refused. That is where the blood came from.

I was told two days later that the tenants of the apartment where the altercation occurred were evicted.

None of this made the News.


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